(15 Nov 2020, 05:52 )Hazel Wrote: [ -> ]I guess I just liked the way the files affirmed my gender feelings at the time...
Affirmed or manipulated? 😉
(15 Nov 2020, 05:52 )Hazel Wrote: [ -> ]the way the narrator referred to me as female and that it loved me for who I am. Kind of like how trans people look for those affirmations irl (pronouns etc).
Very true! I always wonder how people of different languages feel when they are referred to themselves as the opposite gender. Germanic languages are very neutral here. But Latin ans Slavic are not. What should imply different self-identification process and feelings.
(15 Nov 2020, 05:52 )Hazel Wrote: [ -> ]I just liked the way the files affirmed my gender
(15 Nov 2020, 05:52 )Hazel Wrote: [ -> ]like how trans people look for those affirmations
In other words, such affirmations bring you pleasure, right?
(15 Nov 2020, 05:52 )Hazel Wrote: [ -> ]I think death (especially when close to you) always has a profound impact on one's perspective of life. I am not the only one to have such a change in perspective, as many people question the meaning of life, and their place in after the passing of loved ones or friends.
Absolutely.
So now I am confused again by this discussion:
On one hand @
MindsEye and @
essanym are suggesting that I accept myself because I still might be trans. Which are valid points because they speak from personal experience.
While @
Like Ra is agreeing with me that this is a fetish brought on by different "source" feelings and that i should proceed with nofap to heal and rid myself of these manipulated feelings. Again, valid points because I assume he is also speaking from personal experience.
But I am different in this regard:
The problem here is if I "stay trans", well then i will have no choice but to keep all aspects/expressions of my femininity, including files, clothes etc. Because if I don't, sooner or later I eventually get dysphoria feelings all over again.
(15 Nov 2020, 16:43 )Like Ra Wrote: [ -> ]In other words, such affirmations bring you pleasure, right?
Its hard to explain. Sometimes (if the file is highly erotic). But other times like when my family says it or the rare occasions people have Freudian slips with regards to my gender pronouns or even when Kei affirms it during hypnosis; there is this deep feeling of "rightness." Not erotic...just who I think i am meant to be?
(15 Nov 2020, 16:43 )Like Ra Wrote: [ -> ]Affirmed or manipulated?
My attraction to men may have been manipulated...but the gender feeling...I'm not sure. For example, I still identity with the other woman in lesbian scenes like I did when I was at the "lesbian stage" early on in my pmo addiction.
(15 Nov 2020, 17:26 )Hazel Wrote: [ -> ]So now I am confused again by this discussion:
On one hand @MindsEye and @essanym are suggesting that I accept myself because I still might be trans. Which are valid points because they speak from personal experience.
While @Like Ra is agreeing with me that this is a fetish brought on by different "source" feelings and that i should proceed with nofap to heal and rid myself of these manipulated feelings. Again, valid points because I assume he is also speaking from personal experience.
But I am different in this regard:
The problem here is if I "stay trans", well then i will have no choice but to keep all aspects/expressions of my femininity, including files, clothes etc. Because if I don't, sooner or later I eventually get dysphoria feelings all over again.
Also want to add, not just gender dysphoria, but Venus envy as well.
(15 Nov 2020, 17:26 )Hazel Wrote: [ -> ]So now I am confused again by this discussion:
"We currently have 9,581 members registered" - and every user might have his or her own opinion. Welcome to an unbiased forum! 😊
(15 Nov 2020, 17:26 )Hazel Wrote: [ -> ]On one hand @MindsEye and @essanym are suggesting that I accept myself
If you had stopped here, I would have joined them 😉 Accepting is something what can not be overestimated. If you accept the world, accept the weather, accept circumstances, accept the challenges, accept the events, accept yourself, accept your own traits, features and bugs, accept others with their own traits, features and bugs, you might suddenly realise, that you live in a completely different Universe, which is trying to help you to overcome your own issues to progress further, and you will begin to notice the "road signs" and "route directions" you never noticed before 😊
(15 Nov 2020, 17:26 )Hazel Wrote: [ -> ]While @Like Ra is agreeing with me that this is a fetish brought on by different "source" feelings and that i should proceed with nofap to heal and rid myself of these manipulated feelings.
Some time ago you wrote this:
(11 Nov 2020, 03:14 )Hazel Wrote: [ -> ]maybe i am a bad writer
I disagree completely. But you definitely need to improve your reading skills 😉
(16 Nov 2020, 01:54 )Like Ra Wrote: [ -> ] (15 Nov 2020, 17:26 )Hazel Wrote: [ -> ]So now I am confused again by this discussion:
"We currently have 9,581 members registered" - and every user might have his or her own opinion. Welcome to an unbiased forum! 😊
(15 Nov 2020, 17:26 )Hazel Wrote: [ -> ]On one hand @MindsEye and @essanym are suggesting that I accept myself
If you had stopped here, I would have joined them 😉 Accepting is something what can not be overestimated. If you accept the world, accept the weather, accept circumstances, accept the challenges, accept the events, accept yourself, accept your own traits, features and bugs, accept others with their own traits, features and bugs, you might suddenly realise, that you live in a completely different Universe, which is trying to help you to overcome your own issues to progress further, and you will begin to notice the "road signs" and "route directions" you never noticed before 😊
(15 Nov 2020, 17:26 )Hazel Wrote: [ -> ]While @Like Ra is agreeing with me that this is a fetish brought on by different "source" feelings and that i should proceed with nofap to heal and rid myself of these manipulated feelings.
Some time ago you wrote this:
(11 Nov 2020, 03:14 )Hazel Wrote: [ -> ]maybe i am a bad writer
I disagree completely. But you definitely need to improve your reading skills 😉
Ok, so where does that leave me now? Do I just unplug from all this or continue investigating my gender feelings?
(15 Nov 2020, 06:14 )Hazel Wrote: [ -> ]I didn't say that there is anything wrong with being trans.
Just in case: trans is a person who has a
eady transitioned (in the process of transition?). A non-transitioned person is not a trans. A confusion might occur with "transvestites", but the most common "euphemism" - crossdresser - should mitigate the issue 😉
(16 Nov 2020, 12:42 )Like Ra Wrote: [ -> ] (15 Nov 2020, 06:14 )Hazel Wrote: [ -> ]I didn't say that there is anything wrong with being trans.
Just in case: trans is a person who has aeady transitioned (in the process of transition?). A non-transitioned person is not a trans. A confusion might occur with "transvestites", but the most common "euphemism" - crossdresser - should mitigate the issue 😉
No. Trans is transitioning. And is actually more used to actually replace transgender these days to make things sound more inclusive.
And crossdresser IS transvestite. Back before the internet exploded, it was coined to REPLACE transvestite due to the clinical definitions and not wanting to use them. Crossdresser is literally a translation of the latin of transvestite.
If we want to define what trans covers as an umbrella term here are some:
- transsexual
- transsexual non-operative
- CD/TV
- gender fluid
- gender queer
- some intersex (not all, intersex is a different thing)
- gender neutral
Remember - transgender (TG) was coined to be an umbrella term, not a singular label. The internet has warped the definitions etc that have existed since before its explosion.
Myself I am a non-op TS. With my myriad of health issues it's not likely that I will receive gender confirmation surgery. I've been active in the trans community since the mid-90's even while in the Canadian Armed Forces (and second to transition on job). I've been researching gender etc even longer.