Two good points:
1. Before “applying” a new tool on your partner you always must try it by yourself. So selfbondage comes handy here.
2. Can BDSM (mostly DSM) relationships be used during normal family life with your partner? Or do they exclude equal roles that normal, stable, long-term-oriented partnership “should” have? Or are they intended to compensate deficiencies and various (e.g. inferiority) complexes?