Nana to Kaoru. Chapter 6. Inner and outer bondage

See all chapters and related articles here.

Third point – breaking out of bondage. Not literally in this case. We are born as absolutely free creatures. Kids have virtually no limits or restrictions, they are immortal. But with time the parents, the relatives and society do their work of limiting the freedom:

“Do not shout”, “stop crying”, “do not touch yourself there”, “you must/must not wear these clothes”, “boys do not do this”, “you must …”, “you must not …”, “you are not allowed to …”, “you are too young to …”, etc. Some of them are necessary to successfully co-exist and survive, some are unreasonable, some are simply ridiculous. And as a whole they create the “outer bondage”.

Along with the “outer bondage”, we develop our “inner bondage”. We are afraid of doing something, that even allowed by the “outer bondage”, but might not be acceptable by the public moral or at least how we see it or think of it. We expect expectation of others, and we are afraid of not meeting them, even if others never see you. (See also Paraphilias, sexual fetishes, normality, deviations and men vs women)”

Hey, good boys/girls do not do that!“. That means we are bad, aren’t we? Welcome home, inferiority complex!

Restrictions after restrictions, taboos after taboos, years after years… We build our complexes and lose self-confidence. And that prevents us (aha! another restriction!) from growing up. Literally and figuratively.

… to be continued …

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