I got into Bambi Sleep when it came on to the scene in 2017, the strange thing is it feels like much longer ago than that. As a crossdresser who often feels their identity is very much female, any hypnosis which would increase that was something I simply had to experience. I’d a
eady been listening to a lot of feminising hypnosis since 2016, some got a result but a lot didn’t.
I think the reason many things didn’t work on me is because they were done by women, who expected unconditional worship from the first time I listened (fat chance of that if I don’t trust you) and their tone was always filled with mockery and cruelty. I was never a fan of that since in the past I felt a lot of shame and humiliation for being the way I am and I knew that BS was undermining me. Also when you take into account that I never needed to be forced into wearing my female clothes those files seemed pointless.
The Bambi files were different. Since it was TTS, the robotic voice had no personality, nothing to rub me the wrong way or feel jarring. It actually seemed to work on me and I could relax and switch my overly active brain off. That background tone also works wonders on me and really calms me down. You can hear that entirely on its own in the Bimbo Drone file.
I listened to Bambi Sleep a hell of a lot. I followed the listening order on the blog and listened every night for two weeks. I removed the IQ Lock from my playlist after I heard it the first time because it made me uncomfortable. Same goes for the Body Lock, since the medical procedure freaks me out, I can’t even watch Casualty on the television for goodness sake.
So my playlists were typically as follows:
- 01 Bubble Induction
- 02 Bubble Acceptance
- 03 Bambi Named and Drained
- 06 Bambi Attitude Lock
- 07 Bambi Uniformed
- 08 Bambi Takeover
- 09 Bambi Cockslut
- 10 Bambi Awakens
There were times listening to this stuff that had me thinking “WTF am I doing to myself?” So like anyone who feels a bit guilty I stopped listening, removed the files from my phone and told myself I wouldn’t do it again. But something in these files had its hooks in me because I always did return.
In fact after long breaks from listening to Bambi I found it even more powerful when I did listen again. Something about it was helping me break down my stupid inhibitions so in that context it felt good for me.
When the newer material came out I constantly revised my playlist. Oblivion is a very strong file but overwhelming is probably what my analytical mind needed. Despite the fact that it’s intended to replace you entirely with Bambi it did me a lot of good because I found I could trance much better to other files. Maybe it finally broke down all those inhibitions. In this period I did as I stated on another thread listen every night for two months. Guess I was desperate huh?
At no point did I ever become Bambi, maybe because I’ve always felt I’m Crystal deep down and the files couldn’t change that. Of course it’s fair to say that as Crystal I’ve become a little more like Bambi.
So why did I stop considering this all sounds so great and pretty much achieved what I wanted?
A number of reasons. The bimbo suggestions seemed more and more common as newer files were released. I started to feel really stupid sometimes and it interfered with my work. I found myself lounging around and daydreaming. What’s worse I didn’t care and only when I started getting pissed off emails from clients did I find any motivation to snap out of it.
Another problem is that I live in a situation where my crossdressing is closeted and I can’t chance discovery. I do find that distressing because I love to dress and feel like my true self. Yet Bambi has suggestions which make you feel even more distressed about it when you can’t dress as Bambi and I really don’t need that shit fucking with the delicate balance I have a
eady. If the creator had restricted this to one file which you could avoid it wouldn’t be a problem. But he didn’t do that and I find it very irresponsible.
Some bizarre stuff that happened was that I seemed to pick up new mannerisms, started playing with my hair like a girl. Sometimes walking like a girl, or sitting like a girl automatically, mincing with my arms too and sighing like a girl. Once I even heard a girl in my head laughing at me which really scared me. You know when you talk to yourself sometimes? Well I found myself talking more often in my feminine voice which is basically my own voice but much softer in tone and delivery and the things I said were pretty shocking. It also became spontaneous rather than feeling I was doing it purposefully. Some days I would giggle just like Bambi.
I had awful headaches coming out of trance sometimes and one time it was so bad I had no balance and fell over. Other times I got them in the middle of the day, like a fuzzy feeling which wouldn’t go away. There were other oddities like feeling like some of my limbs didn’t belong to me. A bit like that feeling when you sleep on one of your arms and it goes numb.
What else? Oh yes the insatiable desire to suck and pleasure cock. Now I’ve socked cock before but I found myself wanting it more often and I started to daydream about finding myself a boyfriend. In the past my sexuality was more in the middle but listening to Bambi so often I think might have reduced my interest in women and I would think of them as competition.
One more thing. I fell asleep to Bambi a few times and when I woke up I felt incredibly horny. Immediately reaching for my dildo to suck it off. Like some kind of compulsion. As you'd expect I didn't remember falling asleep but I also had no memory of what I'd listened to.
So there you go. Should you listen to this sort of thing? In my opinion no. Well not unless you are very selective and can enjoy it in very small doses. If you get really overkill with it like I did it will change you in ways that you don’t even notice until they become commonplace.
There’s probably more I can mention but this post is long-winded enough as it is. I haven’t listened to Bambi for about a month and while I do feel some part of me is craving to go back I don’t like the way it’s affecting me and making me question my femininity. I want to be the best feminine version of me I can be, not some vain bimbo with no street smarts. Maybe that thought kept me from completely surrendering to this stuff or perhaps it just woke me up to how I really am. I still have no idea what is really me and what is something I’ve been told to think and feel.