Don't usually last long in self bondage, any advice?

[scazzman99]

It’s been a while since I did any self bondage if any bondage as well. But for me, a good chair tie with a short skirt and a fitted tee is a good start. My release is nylons, ice, and keys for padlocks.
I also kept a pair of vibrators and tape them to my “go Zone””. I had an egg timer that connected to a switch to turn on the vibrators about 15 min after I finish my tie.
Works great. Ice lasts about an hour, I last about 20 mins and I’m stuck for 10 min in post pain ( do I have to explained that?) and the 30 in bondage till the ice releases the keys. Yes, keys... about ten of them. But only one works the locks.

I should try to experiment with ice releases. So far I've mainly relied on just using rope and trying to wriggle out when I wanted out. Was just hogtied for like, 3 hours I think, trying to cum for most of it but failing (no stimulants or anything to help lol). Ice or something would ensure that even if I succeeded in orgasm that I wasn't going anywhere. Gotta just take stuff as it comes and not get too worried if I'm not feeling it or something I guess.

[madjack]

Hi @scazzman99 

I can see that you've aeady received some helpful feedback from many of the active forum members, so sorry of I repeat anything they've aeady said!

Firstly, self-bondage is very personal to the individual - what I like can, and probably will, be very different from yourself, Likera, Ltxrob, tinker_D and the others. So don't be put off or daunted by what we think, do or suggest. It's what works for you that matters. If that's as simple as a pair of handcuffs, with the release key in your hand - then that's fine! 

Secondly, always make sure that whatever you're doing is a safe (or as safe as can - there's always a risk with self-bondage) and sane. Test your ideas before fully committing to a self-bondage session. As you mentioned, you don't want to cut off the blood supply to your extremities or injure yourself. So try each new tie/position/idea carefully before committing to a full session (I preach this, but have on occasion not followed my own rules and have come very close to disaster - not fun, very frightening and never to be repeated! Learn from my mistakes and don't make your own - you might not be so lucky... )

Thirdly, ask yourself what it is that you want from a session. Is it the thrill of being bound? Is it wearing certain items? A position? Orgasm or not orgasm? Again, it could be one or more of these things, or something completely different and  special to you. Once you know what it is that you're trying to achieve then plan the session around that; start simple and as you gain more experience then you might want to try bringing more complexity to your play time.

Duration is another one of those very personal things - my own play can vary between short sessions of around 10-15minutes, including set-up, right up to my current 'record' that was closer to 3hrs. I've found that long doesn't always mean 'best' and 'short' can be just as much fun. One rule that I do have is that my bondage for a long session is always something I'm well experienced with and is COMFORTABLE! Being helplessly stuck with an knot digging painfully into something soft is not fun! On the same note I try to avoid positions that are strenuous or over-stretch my capability - there is nothing erotic about cramp when you're roped down to the bed and unable to stretch out to ease it! 

Don't think you are doing anything 'wrong' - you're just learning. I'm still learning and improving(and still making mistakes) after many, many years of self-bondage.

And if nothing else - enjoy what you do for the pleasure it brings 😁 

MJ

[Tinker D]

Madjack is right. What works for me may not work for you.
For me, it’s the clothing or costume that gets me started. Then I add my toys. Sometimes, after the toys, and just starting the tie, I explode and then I’m done.
But when I do reach toward the end of my tie, and I set that last knot, pull the ring device tight or click that last lock closed, that’s when I have my real fun.

So, find out what you like and test it out. You may even surprise yourself.

[Strappado]

In my experience, a session changes a lot, if I focus on other details. I think, if you focus on coming, you will miss a lot, since there are so many body parts involved, as well as your surroundings, the ties, your clothes (or lack of them) etc.  I hope, this makes sense to you, because I cannot explain it better.

[Like Ra]

Yes, and nowadays the sessions became simpler, but with much more attention on the subtle feelings and sensations. Basically, self-bondage becomes more of a meditation, and almost nothing of a jerk-off enhancer.

[essanym]

Yes, and nowadays the sessions became simpler, but with much more attention on the subtle feelings and sensations. Basically, self-bondage becomes more of a meditation, and almost nothing of a jerk-off enhancer.

Well said, Ra. Though my sessions end with wonderful fireworks, everything until then is a form of meditation for me.

[scazzman99]

Madjack is right. What works for me may not work for you.
For me, it’s the clothing or costume that gets me started. Then I add my toys. Sometimes, after the toys, and just starting the tie, I explode and then I’m done.
But when I do reach toward the end of my tie, and I set that last knot, pull the ring device tight or click that last lock closed, that’s when I have my real fun.

So, find out what you like and test it out. You may even surprise yourself.

I feel that. For me I also dress up when I want to do a proper session and I always like to use a gag!

[scazzman99]

In my experience, a session changes a lot, if I focus on other details. I think, if you focus on coming, you will miss a lot, since there are so many body parts involved, as well as your surroundings, the ties, your clothes (or lack of them) etc.  I hope, this makes sense to you, because I cannot explain it better.

Yeah I can get that. I've had good times before just pulling on bonds and feeling the resistance if that's what you mean

[PetraJane]

The length of a session isn't always the be-all and end-all of the things, just the sensations of wearing tights and a pantie girdle, of being gagged and hooded as well as cuffed in some fashion. All contribute to making things good and enjoyable.

It's not about having an orgasm, sometimes it's all about watching the timer tick down and wondering if you've set it long enough for the magic wand (on a different timer) to kick in and if you can resist the urge to orgasm and that will depend on the speed and position of the wand!

Some times it's just being tied up in nice clothes and trying not to move so as to trigger the motion sensor program.
If you haven't got one, search for Qwerty 22's Motion Sensor Self Bondage Program, it's excellent!

[Like Ra]

Qwerty22's Motion Sensor Self Bondage Program

It's here: https://www.likera.com/forum/mybb/showth...hp?tid=711