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+---- Thread: Bambi Sleep stuff (/Thread-Bambi-Sleep-stuff)
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RE: Bambi Sleep stuff - jocelyn_oui - 23 Nov 2025
(02 Aug 2025, 02:20 )ennui ♡ Wrote: let me know if you have any specific questions! i'm usually more helpful and more focused when i'm responding rather than just off the cuff
(02 Aug 2025, 01:54 )Like Ra Wrote: That's the opportunity! The stage is yours, because ... the information is the second most valuable thing after energy. And also it might stop some AGP kinksters from some risky decisions.
the physical consequences from most transition procedures aren't too drastic (fertility notwithstanding). a cis man getting on hrt for a few weeks or on and off for months might give him some gyno at worst
but i knew transition would be insanely hard going in and the social consequences were much more drastic than even i expected
to anyone considering: it is so difficult. it will ruin relationships. it will probably make you contemplate suicide. you are not an exception. it is a horrible horrible place being transitionING and not transitionED
before passing i envied the delusional transfems who could convince themselves of seemingly anything. in some ways i still do. delusion is a good cope
now i am much happier and expressive than even before transition. it was "worth it" in that i have largely reached the goals i set out to accomplish when i started. but the process of transitioning will change you permanently in ways you don't like. you will see a different side of the world and i have had no luck unseeing it
Gemini Wrote:Weight cycling, also known as yo-yo dieting, refers to the repeated loss and gain of weight, often associated with fad diets and unsustainable weight loss methods. This pattern of fluctuating weight can have negative impacts on both physical and mental health, potentially increasing the risk of certain diseases.
highly recommend this article if you're interested in reading more about weight cycling. please please please only try this if you *know* your e2 levels are good and you don't have runaway dht. unrelated: she did her own orchiectomy! very cool individual
This TransAnon?
Nice to meet you ennui. I guess I'll go next: I'm trying to force myself forward. As a kid I remember the quick and 100% certain knowledge that my mother would have none of it. So to get along I went along. To my credit I did tell girls I dated seriously pretty early on, but at the time I thought it was kinky / cross-dressing only. Well that suppression comorbid with adhd and it's superpower: love of all things chemical, and it's been a pretty volatile ride. Had two sons with that girl (who had become wife), then divorce, then some years later I opened the second Durdenesque franchise and got my daughter. Then soon my second Divorce Merit badge. Bundled with that divorce processing I allowed myself to entertain what I had never considered before: Trans. All this time - meticulously balancing the tightrope of binge and cleanup/hide anything and everything when very clearly my own protobamb refused to be suppressed. (Aside: I still haven't told anyone my current belief). Fun fact my second ex wife is a PsyD - and that whole 'love is rich with honey and with venom' thing back from the Roman times? For reference our venom is blue-ringed octopus tier. She would have a field day (which is ironic since she claims to care for the LGBT+ pop)
A huge catalyst for me was COVID. Everybody was cooped up alone for so long, seemed like at one early phase with the thought it was likely a death sentence I think it accelerated some choices for me. That and some other factors: One of my hypersensitivities keeping that decision in check was that I didn't want my kids to pay for my sins - can still viscerally call back high my own high school memories for the reminder of what I would not want them to face. Well, my first son is in second year university so out of the fireplace, second son graduates this year - we'll figure out whatever the fuck the right answer is now post-AI next year, but the high school teasing risk is abating - and that's the factor that had most of the weight these post-COVID years (daughter has many years to go for it to be a concern at which time I will have aged out of any kind of discussion)
So: You mentioned the social is just incalculably costly. That has always been my assumption - also helping to keep me in check. But with all the other factors, a couple of years ago I crossed the knowledge gap to DIY transition - but not putting a label on it. Generally when I have a binge weekend I ensure I lock myself in to a long-term hormonal commitment to keep me on the path - undecyclate, depo-provera IM shots, etc. Trying to burn the fucking rope bridge so I don't do the math and chicken out. I think it's probably going to be undeniable and obvious soon - and I have no fucking idea how I'm going to play it with my kids. 90% chance my eldest notices t thanksgiving dinner when back from school - those time-gap mental image compares are the kickers. 70% chance he doesn't ask about it. Will depend on how many beers he's had I'm guessing. 😉
My guess is like most other things I will be completely honest: No idea what the fuck I'm doing or what the fuck I am beyond just me. Greet every day with Swearengen's Creed (which I have coopted): "Pain, or damage don't end the world. Nor despair. Nor fucking beatings. The world ends when you're dead. Until then you've got more punishment in store. Stand it like a man. And give some back."
Ennui can you share a little about your "i knew transition would be insanely hard going in and the social consequences were much more drastic than even i expected". If you estimated the math like I have and that variable was STILL far off - fuck. You have kids? How did you play it?
LA et al - if we shouldn't be sharing in this public square just say the word. Just nice to meet someone who appears to be just a couple steps ahead on this fucked up path I'm trying to keep myself on.
RE: Bambi Sleep stuff - Like Ra - 23 Nov 2025
(02 Aug 2025, 02:20 )ennui ♡ Wrote: highly recommend this article if you're interested in reading more about weight cycling. please please please only try this if you *know* your e2 levels are good and you don't have runaway dht. unrelated: she did her own orchiectomy! very cool individualFinally read some articles. Oh, those crazy Russians ... Very interesting individual, indeed.