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male vs female
#11
Oh I'm sure that there are gray areas, but I don't think......
Ok, I am having a pretty hard time answering this.
I think I could have picked " The war inside me " or " My fight with myself".
But I picked this title because I felt that there just might be others that could very well has the same conflict as I do inside me.

We all have our little kinks, I have a number of them myself.
When I go to my buddy's house, I just go there as a male and BBQ dinner, play war games, watch sports and get drunk. Nothing more.

But that day, I was done with work pushing an arcade around and sorting quarters from tokens. So, when I got home, I was in no mood for anything except a nice bath and a Gin and Tonic.after that, I just sloped into my favorat nylons, a skirt or shorts and a soft fitted tee. Why? Because that damm female that hides inside me came to the surface after I got out of the bath.

So it's not that I was planing any self bondage or entertaining someone at my house. It was the end of the day and time to relax.

So, is that Crossdressing or being a transsexual?
If I am not on any hormons or HRT, do I fall under Transgender?
No, I don't beleve it does. Bi-polar? Maybe? I know a few of them and they are very scary. Some want to get their dicks cut off and be a female and seconds want nothing to do anything.
So, I'm not Bi-polar eather.

But what happen that nite, was the reason why I gave this thread the title I did.
The rest of the story will continue. And I think you may find it a bit interesting, because it is about what a man thinks and also, in my mind, what a woman thinks.
Reply
#12
(23 Jun 2018, 13:43 )Jewelsandb Wrote:
(23 Jun 2018, 12:55 )Like Ra Wrote:
(23 Jun 2018, 01:56 )Tinker D Wrote: I Have been labeled a CD and a TS. But I'm not anyone of them.
I have thought long and hard about this and did a lot of research. I know that there are a lot of guys and girls going through this.
Yes, the purpose of that thread exactly 😉 I think I have to rename it somehow, to make it less meme-centered.

From the perspective of someone who is a trans woman, I think the best thing you could do to really meet that goal is to create a "Gender Identity" forum under the General section.  As it stands right now, lumping  "All things CD/Xplay/TV/TS/TG/Drag" together, and nesting them under "Fetish" could easily be considered offensive to someone that struggles with their gender identity.  There is a huge difference between wanting to kill yourself because your body doesn't match your identity and wanting to dress up as a different sex because it turns you on.

Somehow, I miss this post. And, I agree.
Now being a trans woman, I'm sure you have been through a lot.
And for someone who doesn't know or understand what we are and go through to pin a label on our back " CROSSDRESSER ", can and is hurtful.

When I join this wonderfull group, I was into self bondage, and still am.
But after the thread cd TG TS and if I were a girl came out, I thought about the many people like me and what we are.

So, thank you for your post.
Reply
#13
(23 Jun 2018, 13:43 )Jewelsandb Wrote:
(23 Jun 2018, 12:55 )Like Ra Wrote:
(23 Jun 2018, 01:56 )Tinker D Wrote: I Have been labeled a CD and a TS. But I'm not anyone of them.
I have thought long and hard about this and did a lot of research. I know that there are a lot of guys and girls going through this.
Yes, the purpose of that thread exactly 😉 I think I have to rename it somehow, to make it less meme-centered.

From the perspective of someone who is a trans woman, I think the best thing you could do to really meet that goal is to create a "Gender Identity" forum under the General section.  As it stands right now, lumping  "All things CD/Xplay/TV/TS/TG/Drag" together, and nesting them under "Fetish" could easily be considered offensive to someone that struggles with their gender identity.  There is a huge difference between wanting to kill yourself because your body doesn't match your identity and wanting to dress up as a different sex because it turns you on.

As another trans woman who is also post-op, I agree with your point on this. Cross-dressing and transgender are totally separate things even though many people that are transgender do cross-dress. The reality is the before I transitioned to female, I was cross-dressing in men's clothes if you want to go to the truth of things. Being transgender is NOT a fetish, cross-dressing is, and drag is a performance art.

Going back to Tinder D's post he states that he is both male and female and has done a lot of research and doesn't fit into the transgender box. However, I do believe he may belong under the trans* umbrella. He could be genderfluid, bigender, gender queer, two-spirited, etc. This individuals have characteristics of both and may not want to change their bodies, name or pronouns.
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#14
(24 Jun 2018, 02:14 )cbshackle Wrote: However, I do believe he may belong under the trans* umbrella.
Indeed. In the "male-female" sex, "male-female" gender, and "male-female" society expectation dichotomies everything in between is called "trans" (what means “across”, “beyond”, “through”, “transverse”). We have a separate thread to discuss these terms: https://www.likera.com/forum/mybb/showth...p?tid=2142
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#15
(23 Jun 2018, 01:56 )Tinker D Wrote: That is male vs female.

E.g. these posts:
https://www.likera.com/forum/mybb/Thread...0#pid28620
https://www.likera.com/forum/mybb/Thread...7#pid28637
Reply
#16
(23 Jun 2018, 13:43 )Jewelsandb Wrote: I think the best thing you could do to really meet that goal is to create a "Gender Identity" forum
Good idea!

(23 Jun 2018, 13:43 )Jewelsandb Wrote: under the General section.
The General section of what? We do not have a "General" forum yet.

(23 Jun 2018, 13:43 )Jewelsandb Wrote: As it stands right now, lumping  "All things CD/Xplay/TV/TS/TG/Drag" together, and nesting them under "Fetish" could easily be considered offensive to someone that struggles with their gender identity. There is a huge difference between wanting to kill yourself because your body doesn't match your identity and wanting to dress up as a different sex because it turns you on.
Yes, very good point! The "TS and gender" subforums are relatively new and evolving. They were aeady moved multiple times and I continue to juggle threads.

But I have an excuse on why it's a subforum of the Fetish section. If you take two dichotomies (dysphoria - euphoria and phobia-philia), the site is more or less about the "pleasure" parts (euphoria and philia), than the opposite. I define "fetish" as a stable (usually addictive) mental and/or sensory stimulus )excluding food, drugs and direct stimulation) resulting in a "dopamine surge" (in other words - pleasure). In these senses changing the identity (what results in diminishing dysphoria and increasing general "pleasure" of life - the role of dopamine) "might" be conditionally placed in this section.

Anyway, I'm completely open to any reasonable suggestion. I investigate this subject, I investigate myself, and you can see how my opinion changes over time. I would like to make it as comfortable for everybody as possible, and to stimulate sharing of opinions and experiences - this is why this site was created, to begin with. Also, what is obvious for one person can be an eye-opening and "my life will never be the same" revelation for another.
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#17
(24 Jun 2018, 02:14 )cbshackle Wrote: Cross-dressing and transgender are totally separate things even though many people that are transgender do cross-dress.
CD (TV, TS, GF, etc) is a subset of TG.
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#18
I think to avoid "labelling" and "memefication" issues the "Fetish" section should be called "Traits" 😉
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#19
Wow, when I started this thread, I didn't think this would happen.

The point I was going for in this male vs female was not to put me into a class or getting a label. When I started to crossdress, as you labeled it, it wasn't because of sex. I was sort of forced into wearing "Light underwear" due to heat rashes that I get every summer. I would get all red and sweatie an ichie. That which goo I was smear all over did nothing. The doctor at the time told me that the main problem was that men's underwear is very restrictive and the heat that builds up causes the rash. So he said to wear lighter, looser underwear or woman's underware.
So I bought a pair and that cured the problem.
So is that Crossdressing?

When it gets really hot, 102-118, I don't care, I'll wear a kilt or a skirt. I'll take the heat from those label makers over a very painfull heat rash any day.

That, my friends, was back in the early 80s.

Now, with said, I'll continue to wear panties as long as I want.
And I blame RA for my love of pantyhose.
Men's tee shirts are thick like some peoples head. Ladies tees are lighter in weight and cooler to wear. As for the kilt, skirt, wraps or whatever you want to label it, they also helps with the heat rash.
So call me what you want, I don't care. I am very happy with who I am, and I'm going live a long happy life. Or at lease 150.

But to add a new wrinkle to this trip is.....
Male vs female.
I can say that a good 80% of men hate....
Shopping for clothing,
Trying on things
Yacking on the phones,
Trotting off to the restrooms with friends
And other things.
On the other hand, females, for the most part
Don't like to get Dirty,
Love to shop,
Get dressed up,
And other things.

I love shopping for clothing. I can send days in the malls and if I was born a female, no clothing rack would be safe.
I like my body shape. Still not sure what happen that triggered my breasts to explode. But I'm not going to have them removed.
I'm me. As weird as some may think of me, I'm still me.
Reply
#20
(24 Jun 2018, 14:10 )Like Ra Wrote: I think to avoid "labelling" and "memefication" issues the "Fetish" section should be called "Traits" 😉

Ok, I like Traits.
Reply


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