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+--- Thread: Introduction (/Thread-Introduction--2505)
Introduction - The inspector - 23 Apr 2019
Hi all,
Just a little hello from me and an introduction. Apologies if I blab on. This is my first time posting about me in the public domain and is quite a step. I’ll explain more on that in a moment.
So, I’m the inspector. And I’ll try and start from the beginning, where my earliest quirks and feelings developed. I will start by saying that even from an early age i have always been drawn to bizarre imagery and taboo topics.
At a young age when I was at school. For the record, I hated school. Not because of the education or the teachers, but the other people o had to go with. I was always quite creative and imaginative, and through my early years I was popular. Then when moving on to high school and kids start developing into supposedly mature adults and conforming to normality I dropped down to the kid that got bullied. Anyhow, whilst at school, I was very interested in history. We briefly glossed over torture and the nefarious methods used over the years to keep the class semi awake. Me being me was intrigued and went home to research it further, as I did with many different things. I sat and read and read. Book after book from the library about various methods. Mesmerised by such things as the rack and the scavengers daughter. The images of people tied down in discomfort sticks with me to this day. Anyways, whilst google searching, I came across an image of a woman on tight clothing being used as a chair. I clicked on the link and was taken to houseofgord.com. although I didn’t quite understand what I was seeing the image was engrained in my head. A short while later we were taken on a trip away with school for a week to an activity centre. Here they took you wading through rivers and building camps/shelters etc. One night one of the kids I was forced to share a room with shoved us into the wardrobe and shut the doors, then ramming the bed up against them hoping for some sort of reaction from me. This was the first time that I began to truly realise that I wasn’t entirely normal. If anything these kids had Donne me a favour. As I sat there in darkness I was free to think whatever I wanted. Nobody to distract. Nobody to interrupt, just alone with my own thoughts. Another thing to note was the claustrophobia that I could have felt didn’t phase me. I loved the feeling of being closed in. And from here my story really begins.
A few months on, I was with some friends and as a laugh one of them tied me to the side of some bunk beds. I got the weird sensation I had never felt before. I couldn’t place it, I couldn’t work out what it was. It was just bizarre. The next weekend my parents went away for the day and left me at home alone. It was one of the first times they had done this. Intrigued to try and recreate the sensation I had had only a few days prior I grabbed some string and ratchet straps from the garage to try and recreate the feeling. After only half tying my legs together to the corner of my bed I felt a sudden pulse between my legs and thus came for the first time,l blowing my load. I won’t lie, I was confused. I come from a family where both parents are pretty prude over anything rude or sexual. So having no sex education and living a generally geeky lifestyle meant that I was overwhelmed and paniced to see this whitish sticky substance lined my underwear. I was so embarrassed/worried that I actually burnt my underwear and buried the ashes at the end of the garden. The years went by and like many lads I went to clubs and pubs and ended up with various lasses where I became more understanding and comfortable with my sexuality.
Next, after leaving college l attended my first heavy metal/rock festival.
This community of heavy metal and rock seemed like a haven for me. People were understanding. It generally didn’t matter what you looked like, what your sexuality was. You were accepted. To this day I would much rather be around these types of people than “normal” do gooders. Here I met a lass and was invited back to her tent. We had some drinks and then went to do the deed. In the process of throwing my top off when I hear a sudden series of clicks and a snap around my wrist. I looked up only to find she had handcuffed me to the tent pole. I cannot even begin to describe how turned on I was. I don’t think even to this day I have cum so quickly. We never ended in a relationship, but that odd feeling did start to bring back the images from the house of gord which I began to study intensively, resulting in signing up for the paid subscription. A part of me always told myself that what I was into wasn’t right. I was searching online for play partners and even researched local dominatrix to quench my thirst for it. I had a few longer term relationships in this period but none ever ended up lasting. I kept my fetishes and quirks to myself and have done to this day. In the end I even travelled abroad to a fetish show their to avoid meeting/seeing anyone I know. Keeping my different lifestyle private.
The only person I have opened up about any of it to face to face is my wife. She knows some stuff, but doesn’t understand the sensations or reasoning. For this reason I keep my darkest experiences to myself and “play” when she isn’t at home. I keep all my stuff locked away in hard cases hidden in the house. I think it’s best to say I love two lives. My happy “normal” life with her and friends in a job that I love. But secretly long for a life of being used by a dominant. Tied up and gagged.
So as some may have a
eady read in the self bondage section of this forum I am preparing for my biggest session yet. Building everything in secret from my wife, ready to assemble it altogether when I have the house to myself for a couple of weeks. In some ways, I take my inspiration for Geoff Gord and JG leathers. Firstly, I’m always looking for next blind adventure. Something that will push me to the next level. Secondly, my body is not a temple. It will not arrive to the pearly gates in pristine condition. It will be used and arrive saying that was one hell of a ride! With that in mind I hope that I have found a home/community that I can express myself and engage in conversation in something that I have kept hidden for sol long, even from this I love most. These desires will never leave me and I have learnt that I have to embrace me for being me. By doing so I can live my life to the fullest and enjoy both the normal life, and the life of a kinkster.
RE: Introduction - Like Ra - 23 Apr 2019
I wonder what would have happened if there were Internet and smartphones when I was a kid.
RE: Introduction - The inspector - 23 Apr 2019
I had dial up as a very young kid. I’ve grown up with modern tech I guess. Still use books for a lot of things and libraries were great growing up.