Sylvia Black - I am not a butt faggot 

for your listening pleasure or not
StepAside productions proudly presents
co written and edited by painted sin
and now original score by Needlechill 2011
and now please enjoy the show

coming out of it now alert and fully aware of your surroundings
one 
eyes about to open 
and 
zero
wake up
close your eyes darling
go on
close them
you must be exhausted    you are so exhausted
knowing what I say is real
don't worry the session was a complete success
you should be very worried
six
all resistance fading away
three
one
and deeper and deeper
believing every word
[it's real]
I'm the only one who tells you what you can think
feel 
believe
I am everything you are allowed to
to feel 
breathe
you are reduced to a single thought in my head
of course if it was the other way around
and I'm only the thoughts implanted inside your mind
not me
but if I'm your thoughts that would mean 
you're taking over yourself
as if you're already gone
so already gone
it is so hard to think
so heavy
it would be so easy to let go of it
can't remember the last time you used it anyway
conscious thought
personality
so much junk
so heavy
heavy thoughts

so much easier to go ahead
and let me carry the box for you
to let me your free will
your memory of free will
your memory
personality and behaviour
so much easier
as you set the box down
you are so very deep in trance

and now that I have your attention
and I do have your complete attention
tell me sweetie
kind of like the attention 
you'd show
 a girl out walking on the sidewalk at the mall
or at a movie theatre
pretty much the sort of attention you'd show a girl anywhere
any girl that looks hot in those tight jeans
that 
top that holds her firm round tits
that cleavage you openly gawk at
but
I think it's time for you to start
looking at something else
yes
I do believe you've bothered us girls quite enough
I think it's time you paid a little more attention to the boys
that's right
from now on
whenever you're out in public
or  
even at your home
whenever there's a guys ass to look at
you're going to look at it
and not just in passing
you're going to stare at it
wide eyed as if you were feeling the deepest
most ah
awe inspiring lust
one could feel when looking at a picture or a person
yes you will look at pictures too
but we'll get to that later
picture imagine think of the joke of the handyman bent over with the heavy toolbelt
and that
hairy asscrack peeking out from beneath the belt and jeans
now 
picture yourself standing there in the kitchen
from now on
for the rest of your life
if that situation were to occur
your eyes would be unable to look at anything else
you would stare at that ass crack
while it wiggled and wobbled 
gawking open mouthed
with a 
hard 
throbbing 
boner in your pants
oh you wouldn't feel aroused
you would feel however you feel right now about a guys ass
it's just that 
now you'll be looking at them
if you're disgusted by men's asses you'll still be disgusted 
except now
whenever you see one passing by or lingering
you have to look
your head will whip around to get a peak at a firm ass
or a fat ass
it doesn't matter
as long as it's a man's ass
you will find yourself unable to sneak glances at women any more
and if your able to keep a man's ass
 in focus for longer than say
five seconds
you're going to feel 
an uncontrollable stirring down below
as you get harder
 and harder
 looking at those buns of steel
 of some high school jock
that are still some high school jock and his friends
 laughing like idiots
 and punching each other on the shoulder as they go walking by
and you start to stand up
well the little you does anyway
stand at attention boy
there's another boy's ass
and 
 just for fun
you're going to find yourself compelled
drawn
to men's locker rooms
anywhere you can find them
at a local gym
as swimming pool
wherever
you'll scour your phone book
the internet
to find as many places that have locker rooms for you to shower in
with the other boys
the other men
and just like everywhere else
your little peepers are going to be  drawn down down down
as your little soldier rises up up and up
yes you won't be able to help but stand there wet 
with the hot water beating down on you
looking at an old man's ass
a teenager's ass
and a full hardon
throbbing beneath that beading water
and if a man notices
and looks at you with distain
or says something
all you can do is blush
apologise 
and run away
if the man becomes threatening
then you're just going to have to cry your way out of it
that's right
you don't fight any more
that would be too crude
you just cry and yell for help
you say please don't hurt me
all the while you're still rock hard
and 
waiting for him to turn around so you can stare some more
another thing 
I we'd get to are pictures
and not just pictures
videos
pornography
I'm sure you have several sites hotlisted
or memorised if you are in a relationship
that show you a few pretty girls doing some pretty naughty things
but now 
when you try to go to those sites
or when you try to find new sites
you'll think you're typing in the correct address
or searching for big tits blonde hair
whatever it is you are normally turned on by
but you'll be confused when suddenly
you're looking at men fucking other men
at guys
buff and hard 
and fucking
and sucking 
and looking into the camera
oh you’ll like that
you'll have a hardon 
and you'll be stroking 
just as if there were girls on the screen
but your face will be filled with disdain
or disgust
or simple confusion
once again
you'll feel the same way you feel about guys
the same way you've felt about guys your entire life
prior to listening to this file
if you weren't turned on by male pornography prior to listening to this file
it won't turn you on to look at it again
but still
 the blood will rush to your penis
and your penis will get hard
and your hand will move 
up and down and up and down
just like the man fucking the other man in the ass
up and down up and down
and finally you'll manage to pull your way out of the site
you'll be able to click the mouse in the other direction
maybe go hunting some female porn
and yet you just find more men
possibly chubby hairy men this time
is that what you typed in the search engine darling?
some big bears as they're called in the gay community
big flabby butts
bouncing up and down
rolling on top of each other
yes 
no matter how hard you try
and you will be very hard
even though you won't be the least aroused
you will end up looking at gay pornography
gay male pornography
you will never be able to find your way to female pornography again
even if a friend managed to 
bring it up for you
or if some porn were lying out on the kitchen table
you would not notice it
it would be fleeing and passing
and you might knock the magazine off the table
or if you moved the mouse to get a better look at a site 
accidentally close it
my point is you won't be able to look at a naked woman for very long
or even a sexy woman for very long
and unfortunately for you
it's not just pictures darling
it's people too
you'll find your eyes have the hardest time keeping track
of hot women
whether its you girlfriend or a stranger
your eyes will wander away
so fast
the more aroused you get
the sexier they are the hotter they are
whenever you feel aroused
by a hot girl
you eyes will immediately 
move away
your head will jerk
and your eyes will find something else to look at
even if you're trying to have sex
your eyes will run away
you'll run away
as much as you want it
the more aroused you become
the more adamant the more firmly you reject the thing that is arousing you
the girl that is arousing you
no you'll run away and as you're running 
maybe there'll be another man running in spandex
jogging and maybe you'll start to pretend jog
jogging by the man
with a nice big hardon
not feeling the least bit turned on
but jogging with an obvious erection
jogging because from now on 
you're going to make sure you are wearing tight clothes
tight jeans tight shorts
tight everything
you're always going to be showing when you have an erection
and any attempt to hide it
with magazines or newspaper or your hand
will only cause you to 
slip to rub it a bit
or maybe unbutton your pants accidentally
you're going to learn very quickly 
not to attempt to hide your boner in any way
otherwise
you'll be showing and stroking wherever you are
and there won't be the least thing you can do about it
except to accept the fact
that
you walk around all day staring at men's asses 
with a big boner everyone can see
and 
that's just your life now
that's who you are
and even when you're jerking off
if you 
if your mind wanders to a woman
even alone
no pictures
no anyone
no anything
just your thoughts
and you start to get hard
you start to get aroused
finally away from all this embarrassment
as soon as an image of a naked woman
or a woman in clothes
any woman
she appears in your mind
you'll go completely limp
and suddenly a bunch a barrage of men's asses assholes
will come flying through your head
through your thoughts
as you
sit there pathetically wanking on your limp little wiener
just sitting there
 for at least an hour 
as men's asses as their assholes
run like a filmstrip through your mind
and you rub and stroke
maybe get some lotion
we don't want you hurting that little wee wee of yours do we?
and you'll just stroke and stroke
and that will be the best you can do
when it comes to masturbation
I don't think you'll be climaxing to much in your new life
you will be compelled to listen to this recording over and over again
every time you do
my suggestions will go deeper become stronger
you won't be able to resist them
you won't be able to look at women
or think about women in sexual way
ever again
but you won't find men sexually exciting either
you'll want to look at women
you'll be desperate to look at women
you want to look at women
you want to fuck women
you want to jerk off to women
but all you can see are men
men's asses
men's tight firm fat flabby asses
bald young
that's all there is
and if any man gets angry at your obvious lust
lust he doesn't realise is fake
well again you'll just going to have to cry your way out of it
cry and beg him not to hurt you
and if he 
looks like he's going to 
I'm afraid you might have a little accident and wet your pants like a little boy
just crying and maybe running to the closest woman you can find for help
begging her to help you
but
while you're begging sweetie
I wouldn't look to closely at her
you know what happens when you 
try to get aroused by a woman
just accept the nice woman's help
and
go about your business at looking at men's asses
that is your business after all
you'll pay men to stand there naked while you look at their asses
you'll find prostitutes models
pay them to look at their asses
and sit the bed
not fucking them 
not sucking them
just paying them a hundred dollars
so you can sit and stare at their bare ass
for an hour
yes sweetie this is your life
your whole life
yes is just a man's asshole
every man's asshole
to stare at
no matter what you think
no matter what you feel
and that's it
that's all darling
that's not so bad 
is it?
and now it's time to drift back into consciousness
to drift back into real life
into the life I've forced upon you
I'm gong to count back from five to zero
and with each number
the suggestions implanted inside your brain
will flare and make you feel energised
as they burn even deeper into your subconscious
and the world as you now know it will become quite clear
five
a spark ignites the flame in your mind
four
a flaming series of words
everything I said 
everything I told you burning in your mind
three
beyond the fire 
you begin to see shapes
the shapes I want you to see
as your eyelids begin to flutter
two
your muscles starting to twitch and move
as if a puppeteer were pulling your strings
coming out of it now
alert and fully aware of your surroundings
one
eyes about to open
and zero
wake up