Hi. I hope it's okay to be a noob and start a thread.
I just wanted to say hello and tell a little about myself. I have recently come to a major turning point in my life by realising that I am a transgendered person. For many years I put on the act of being totally male but it was not me. My core personality is very much female. This has been liberating. I have not come out to those closest to me, but it feels great being able to accept myself as Nicki after all these years. I've been wearing womens clothing all my life, mostly in secret, and I have always been completely addicted to tights and pantyhose. Just recently I stumbled across this site as part of a Google search, having been bondage curious for a few years now. What can I say other than that self bondage is extremely addictive. The rush of wiggling my remaining free arm into a pantyhose one glove is amazing. Not knowing how long it's going to be before I can get myself free. Or maybe I won't be able to get out at all. Last night I got totally stuck and it took me a very long time to finally rip myself out. The feeling of the endorphins is hard wired into my brain permanently.
Probably not transgendered, but transvestite or crossdresser. I hope you won't go the TG way... Operations, hormones... Nah... Far from a healthy life, unlike TV/CD. Being a CD is much easier - no make-up, no trying to look like a woman. And usually looks better. We've discussed this subject in detail somewhere in this forum.
Yes, all these things are addictive. Latex, pantyhose, swimsuits, bondage... You always want more.
Nope I'm not going to go for surgery. Not at this point anyway. I'd be happy to read the thread you mentioned because the more opinions the better. I thought I was a transvestite for many years. It was the only way I got through my teens, but I really do fit the pattern of the 'cloistered male transgender' and have always felt deep down I was a lot more female than male, but I will take what you said on board of course and give it serious thought. Tomorrow is my birthday, but I hope I've got a few more decades to complete my life journey, so no need to rush.
I can definitely agree that I wouldn't make a very attractive woman. Feminine arms and legs yes, but the face of Simon Cowell.
I would say, leave that turning point a bit further behind and then reconsider what you really are. My theory is that male and female are simply the two opposide sides of a long scale and there is much more than just male and female, the scale many dimensions. I have noticed that "wrong" behaviour is accepted pretty well these days as long as it doesn't concern outfit, sex and movement and I have stopped thinking about how much I am male or female, it doesn't matter. I still love women for sex and company, I can't imagine any sexual contact with men, though that is something I never explored, a few men do attract me. I like cross dressing, even got some silicone breasts and wigs and of course I have been thinking about this for decades. In the past, I thought I might be bisexual, be in the wrong body or have no specific gender at all. The ideas kept changing and I really wonder if I will think the same in a couple of years.
But one thought has never changed: It is a real pity that appearance still has to be so gender-specific, especially the appearance of men. I even have the impression, that this has become stronger over the last 10 or 20 years.
Well, this is just my two cents. My only serious advise follows now: Don't try to be what you want to be, just be what you are. It might seem a bit dull at first reading, but believe me, it works pretty well but it is also very hard to follow, starting with the big question, what you really are.
PS: I have explored some of my female aspects in many online communities (games, forums, SecondLife, etc.). It is a very special experience to be seen as a women by others and it has an enormous impact on my own behaviour. It also changed my view on men a lot. Women are still very strange beings though but I picked up a few tricks 😉
Interesting topic here and I though I would throw my 2 cents worth in. I’ve gone back and forth with all of these and it’s hard to put a label on myself, something I don’t like doing but sometimes you need one to explain yourself to someone (that is "open".) I’ve pretty much concluded now that I am gender fluid. Sometimes I’m male, other times female. Fortunately my wife is also gender fluid. Both of us growing up most assumed I was gay and she was a lesbian. In reality it’s probably more like I’m a lesbian in a male body and she is a gay male in a female body. It certainly works for us, but neither one of us would change our physical sex so we are not trans, but we do have many trans friends and we all get each other so to speak.
One thing that is consistent is that my sexual energy is mostly female and I’ve been told this by both bisexual women and lesbians. However my day to day life I enjoy my male body, but my movements are in the middle, but being 6’7” tall, I fool most people just by my height.
My wife and I have both concluded that it would be great if we were able to either switch genders or both be women for sex. No matter what we both feel very lucky we found each other.
Believe me, I've seriously been thinking about what I am for decades. As a child I thought I was female and would grow up to be a woman. It was devastating when I found out that wasn't possible and I spent decades trying to hide my female identity. Only in the past few years I've allowed myself to nurture my true self and not hide behind stereotypical male behaviour that caused me a lot of anxiety. It's all a journey and I don't know where it will end.
Hi TrannyNicki,
Welcome, and know you're not alone. We're a pretty broad-minded easy-going lot here 😉