I have had a panic attack during my self bondage for a while after I close the last lock. I use the kitchen safe as a bondage prayer, and I also have a backup place. but still I panic and my heartbeat is racing. sometimes when i use my latex mitts i get completely upset. anyone advice?
Start smaller? Maybe ?
Simple self bondage, then slowly work up to more complex ties.
Panic is part of the fun.*
*If you play safe.
It's been a long time I had that feeling, at least as strong as it used to be years ago. Consider yourself lucky 😉 although a full blown panic attack is a bit too much.
I've actually felt the exact same latex mitt panic that you have. I remember the last time this happened, I had to find a way to calm myself down through some breathing, and remind myself of all the precautions I have taken to ensure my own safety.
"I believe in the me that spends so much time planning and preparing."
Breathe*, believe, and if you can get your brain working logically again, you should be able to mentally talk yourself down. Have a fantasy scenario in your head to help try to knock the serotonin loose. As soon as you can talk yourself down from panicking, try to get yourself back into the fantasy as soon as possible.
*if you can't breathe, then something may have actually gone wrong and you need to get out of there
If you have a toy applied anywhere, focus on that. Focus on the enjoyable sensations, and try to do everything you can to improve those sensations (bend into the vibrator, clench onto the plug, etc) so your mind can be overtaken by pleasure instead of panic. It's kind of like that trope where the hero keeps control of their mental faculties by concentrating on the pain from a wound. This is like that, but with more enjoyable sensations. I don't know about anyone else here, but I find it's really hard to have a panic attack when my body is clawing its way up to orgasm like a starving animal.
I have managed to avoid panic attacks for the most part. Only when I've gotten a partner to help push my limits have I been hitting panic attacks like this. If I can't mentally talk myself down, then I have hit my limit at that point. With some aftercare, I find that I'm able to go a little bit further now that I've seen that the scenario I was panicking in did not actually kill me. I know not everyone can get this done, but having a partner really helps push your limits.
Overall, keep trying, know that panic is a natural unconscious reaction, and try to grow from it. 👍
That sort of panic (heartbeat going awry) happened to me years ago the first time I tried a latex hood with a breathing tube.
With practise, breathing slowly and deeply, the problem went away. Now, I can wear an inflatable rubber hood with an inflatable breath thru gag for extended periods (few hours) without any issue.
BTW, IMO panic is never safe (even if it might be sexually arousing). This is a state of mind when everything is out of control and logical reasoning have dissolved. Consequences are usually dire. A well known problem in aviation when bad things happen.