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Purge syndrome or Periods or cycles of lost&found "interest"
#11
I don't think the feelings expressed in this thread are unusual at all, in fact I think they are 100% normal for the majority of men (can't speak for women as I'm not one!).

My personal experiences are very similar, though I would extend the feeling to vanilla sex - in both cases the build up and foreplay (self-bondage if you like) are a massive turn on, but within minutes of my orgasm all I want to do is sleep or get free.

For that very reason I try to make my self-bondage sessions as intense as possible for as long as possible before I cum - knowing that once the 'rush' is over I will become very bored, very quickly.

I once read that if a man can stay awake after ejaculation for 15minutes or so, then he's good to go again - and in my experience that's true! If I can stay focused after sex with my girlfriend then within 20mins I'm right back and ready to go again... if I can stay focused (and if she wants me of course).

I really want to test this theory out in self-bondage too, so that I can cum more than once in the same session (by using a massager/vibrator on a timer) - but so far I've failed to fulfil my dream. I either can't cum at all (which is fun and frustrating in equal measure) or else I do cum but the bondage isn't good enough to keep me helpless and ready for the next cycle of vibration 20minutes or more later.

If time permits I will be trying again this year to fulfil my fantasy, but in the meanwhile I will enjoy my fun and not worry too much if I cum too soon.

MJ
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#12
I rarely post, but this is a fascinating thread. Thanks guys. For me it used to be linked to purge cycles, now I realize it is just part of the normal hormonal cycle of orgasms. Somebody once pointed out that younger men have the problem even worse, their hormones go higher and lower. Now I just safely stash my cuffs, plugs, hose, leotards, hoods, etc., ride out the low the best I can, and look forward to another session. Sometimes sooner, sometimes later.
Reply
#13
(24 Feb 2016, 16:49 )madjack Wrote: I don't think the feelings expressed in this thread are unusual at all, in fact I think they are 100% normal for the majority of men (can't speak for women as I'm not one!).

My personal experiences are very similar, though I would extend the feeling to vanilla sex - in both cases the build up and foreplay (self-bondage if you like) are a massive turn on, but within minutes of my orgasm all I want to do is sleep or get free.

For that very reason I try to make my self-bondage sessions as intense as possible for as long as possible before I cum - knowing that once the 'rush' is over I will become very bored, very quickly.

I once read that if a man can stay awake after ejaculation for 15minutes or so, then he's good to go again - and in my experience that's true! If I can stay focused after sex with my girlfriend then within 20mins I'm right back and ready to go again... if I can stay focused (and if she wants me of course).

I really want to test this theory out in self-bondage too, so that I can cum more than once in the same session (by using a massager/vibrator on a timer) - but so far I've failed to fulfil my dream. I either can't cum at all (which is fun and frustrating in equal measure) or else I do cum but the bondage isn't good enough to keep me helpless and ready for the next cycle of vibration 20minutes or more later.

If time permits I will be trying again this year to fulfil my fantasy, but in the meanwhile I will enjoy my fun and not worry too much if I cum too soon.

MJ

I have tried this 20min  "time out" and it's working but I was not SB,  my GF tied me up and took a remote for  Hitachi.  And she play with it... 😊

I will try to do that alone in "SB mode" next week with ice lock which will keep me locked for more then 1 hour

Слава Україні

"We who have seen war, will never stop seeing it. In the silence of the night, we will always hear the screams. So this is our story, for we were soldiers once, and young."

Joe Galloway


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#14
Yea, I know the feeling too. That's why I don't allow myself to come whilst in a session.
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#15
I think, from a natural point of view, self-bondage is quite a waste indeed, since all the sperm never reaches a potential target. However, just like at "normal sex", there are two parts, preparation and the act. And in both situations, you might not get to the act, if you are too hot. You have to experiment and find out, how much is possible without a premature end and keep your session-profile accordingly low. Losing interest after coming is absolutely normal. Biologists might say, that this is important, so they can get up early next morning to go hunting for the next mammouth. 😉

Many people like timed bondage, perhaps for this same reason (gettting bored after coming, not for the next mammouth). You tie yourself up and use a device that prevents you from getting free before a given (or estimated) time. So, even if you come early, you can't get free yet and might get hot again.

I often enjoy the anticipation much more than a (short) session. I spend a lot of time dressed up in fetish gear, perhaps partially bound etc. And that is definitely not a waste of time!
Reply
#16
This is an issue for straight, vanilla couples too. There seems to be something different in mens and womens sexual plumbing that says to men 'ok, that's over, change mood' after orgasm which sort of happens differently for women. Maybe it's related to women often being able to have multiple orgasms? Anyway, straight couples often encounter this as the woman wanting some aftercare and the man wanting to roll over and sleep and the woman experiencing that as rejection. The old joke about 'do you smoke after sex?' 'No, I use lubricant' comes to mind.
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#17
(27 Jun 2014, 03:34 )nibrocd Wrote: I feel like self bondage is a waste of time. Specifically after orgasm. Any tips or ideas to help solve this

Its like saying eating food is a waste of time, specifically after full up. It is totally normal don't worry. It is not a big deal don't feel guilty or something, don't care that much. You are aight.
Reply
#18
(07 May 2017, 12:57 )sissyfootslave Wrote: Its like saying eating food is a waste of time, specifically after full up.
😁 Yes, food is for feeding toilets 😁
Reply
#19
(25 Feb 2016, 10:21 )Vixien Wrote:
(24 Feb 2016, 16:49 )madjack Wrote: I don't think the feelings expressed in this thread are unusual at all, in fact I think they are 100% normal for the majority of men (can't speak for women as I'm not one!).

My personal experiences are very similar, though I would extend the feeling to vanilla sex - in both cases the build up and foreplay (self-bondage if you like) are a massive turn on, but within minutes of my orgasm all I want to do is sleep or get free.

For that very reason I try to make my self-bondage sessions as intense as possible for as long as possible before I cum - knowing that once the 'rush' is over I will become very bored, very quickly.

I once read that if a man can stay awake after ejaculation for 15minutes or so, then he's good to go again - and in my experience that's true! If I can stay focused after sex with my girlfriend then within 20mins I'm right back and ready to go again... if I can stay focused (and if she wants me of course).

I really want to test this theory out in self-bondage too, so that I can cum more than once in the same session (by using a massager/vibrator on a timer) - but so far I've failed to fulfil my dream. I either can't cum at all (which is fun and frustrating in equal measure) or else I do cum but the bondage isn't good enough to keep me helpless and ready for the next cycle of vibration 20minutes or more later.

If time permits I will be trying again this year to fulfil my fantasy, but in the meanwhile I will enjoy my fun and not worry too much if I cum too soon.

MJ

I have tried this 20min  "time out" and it's working but I was not SB,  my GF tied me up and took a remote for  Hitachi.  And she play with it... 😊

I will try to do that alone in "SB mode" next week with ice lock which will keep me locked for more then 1 hour

Ok, my turn.
True, after a great self bondage, and poping my load, I want to get free.
But I found out that for me that is, if the vibrator that is taped to my penis contunes to run, it starts to hurt.
But if the vibrator were to turn off, for 10 min or so, then when it comes back on, there is a greater chance you can cum again.

Now, if you have a partner that loves bondage as much as you do, instead of the wand or vibrator, have your partner rub and stroke your wilted pecker and soon, it will get hard again. But stroke it lightly, don't maned handel it to the point of hurting. Of course some do get off on that.
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#20
(27 Feb 2016, 00:18 )Strappado Wrote: I think, from a natural point of view, self-bondage is quite a waste indeed, since all the sperm never reaches a potential target.
Self-bondage does not imply masturbation or orgasm 😉 Quite the contrary, the idea of bondage and self-bondage is to prevent masturbation/orgasms and enjoy the helplessness. Unless the goal is a forced orgasm, of course 😁
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